What to do in front of someone’s anger? |
Perhaps you has passed that someone is angry with you right or apparent reason from your point of view. Happens very occasionally is not important, but if it happens again and again, pay close attention because it can start to affect your wellbeing.
Logically you can not force anyone to act like you want to do it, or force it to for example, be angry because you’re in a good mood with you. But neither can afford to become the focus of criticism and download of trouble. constantly bear his derogatory comments, complaints or disagreements regardless of whatever reason: for what you did, you did or did not do it quite exhausting and weakening energy.
It ‘s not about being right, but of peace. In addition, being right is relative, because what may be right for you, for the other may be wrong or vice versa. So you need to pay close attention to not be engaging in pointless discussions that do not reach any purpose.
What you can do against someone reiterativo anger is primarily politely tell you to calm down, no need to get in that state as it is possible to talk about what bothers you without being altered. But if the person continues then beam behavior that this has nothing to do with you (and costs at first due to the insistence of the other person who seeks to make you react). This means that if you already gave him or her the opportunity to reach an agreement with you and his attitude remains negative, so now you belong not allow their words or attitudes still hurting your being. Then you can tell respectfully but firmly something like this as appropriate: “I’m sorry I offended you or upset you with my behavior, however, you see it that way, but I do not see it as serious. I will improve on what I can, but I ask the favor and I would not keep repeating, that’s enough “.
After this, if you notice that the person is already calming down, take advantage of this state of serenity to discuss the possible misunderstandings that have been the cause for having unleashed this obfuscation, trying to understand what is likely to understand or just accept the differences.
Should this not be possible because one of the two is not willing to get to this step, and looking for ways to stay away either temporarily until that person breathes the atmosphere in the relationship improves. Fortunately, in most cases no problem is forever and if we see with other eyes end up being simplicities or issues irrelevant, but we ourselves who the exaggeration or agravamos to not seek a more peaceful alternative and follow ruminating and ruminating in our mind, without realizing that we are wasting our valuable time.
What can be solved, because I Fix it and for now no solution, then accept it and live quiet. Deserve peace, it is your natural right, no one can take it away without your consent.
Choose and therefore harmony instead of discord, dialogue rather than the imposition of criteria, love instead of ego and something quite important, it shows a deep serenity to help incite the other to also serene. Make this attitude a way of life and you will be surprised to reap the fruits in your relationships.
Remember, everyone is entitled to make mistakes and can not afford to stay there recreating the error again and again and lamenting because that all it does is feed the negative emotion of the unwanted.
Someone mad at you is not the problem, the problem is when you let it affect your peace, even your self-esteem. The problem is experience that situation so often that getting used to finish without that means of course that you get to feel satisfied.
Many times in life you need to make a stop along the way to check aspects like these that could make part of your everyday life and perhaps you had not noticed. Thinking: “No, what happens is that he / she is, is her way of being, so it remains angry” is no longer sufficient, much less rewarding for that person or for those who are on their side. It is always possible to improve, always !, but for this you need to be ready, you need to want to do it from the depths of being.
Are you with these people who are not interested in lifelong learning ?, let you spread this way of conduct ?, how can you take the initiative now to be an active part of the change?
Now, if it is you who is angry, express your anger, but avoid hurting the other to enlarge the problem; It assumes the responsibility that you, as this is always mutual; take a deep breath and once being calmer, looking for a possible solution.
Your anger will not stick to your personality, but is only a temporary and always self-regulated expression and conscious. Also, the anger of another, do not spoil a beautiful moment you are building therefore learn to cope with anger with new eyes.